Wednesday, July 20, 2016

The Magnificent Seven

I have empathy for Melania Trump.  She is neither a candidate nor a public speaker.  I know not how she ended up in the mess in which she found herself on Monday night after she paid homage to Michelle Obama by dusting off the eight-year-old speech that Mrs. Obama had originally delivered at the 2008 Democratic Convention and sharing it with the attendees at the 2016 Republican Convention.  I doubt highly that it was a situation of her creation.  Frankly, I could not care less.  If in this election cycle - the Autumn of our Electoral Discontent - your decision for whom to vote for whom to not vote turns on a speech made by a candidate's spouse then might I humbly beseech you to start passing around the pipe full of whatever it is you are smoking.    

I have significantly less patience for our Governor. Once upon a lifetime ago, prior to becoming our governor he was the United States Attorney for the District of New Jersey.  In case you had either forgotten that - or perhaps has not been aware of that fact - he certainly went to lengths to make you aware of it during his speech on Tuesday night.  Nice to see that he and America's Mayor both graduated with honors from the Howard Beale School of Public Speaking.  Thus, when I heard him declare on Tuesday morning that Mrs. Trump's speech did not constitute plagiarism because only seven percent of her speech was not her own, I knew not whether to laugh or cry.

What a refreshing attitude from a former law enforcement officer.  Best of all, his "7%" rule has practical applications  as a defense to allegedly bad behavior both in the legal world ("Your Honor, my client cannot be sued for divorce on grounds of adultery as he was unfaithful to his wife only 7% of the time that they were married") and in the real world ("Gee, Mr. Kenny, I do not see why you are upset, when I rotated your car's tires I re-fastened all but 7% of the lug nuts").    

Nice to know the Governor grades on such a generous curve.  Upon hearing his comments on Tuesday morning, I could not help but wonder if his repeated denials about Bridgegate are 100% true or just 93% true.  After all, what is 7% between friends, right?   

His cronies' trial starts in September.  Stay tuned.  

-AK

No comments: