Saturday, September 21, 2013

Life as I Know It

While I suspect that the following shall reveal more about the state of my Life than I might be comfortable having held up for public inspection, I am compelled to reveal that Thursday was one of the best days I have had in quite some time.  Not "Suzanne and Ryan Wedding Day" level of bliss of course but leaps and bounds ahead of the usual Thursday. 

I arrived home Thursday to find that Margaret's nephew Frank - who doubles as our kick-ass landscaper - had finished creating his latest masterpiece, which I had requested:  a grill pad.  As someone who loves to grill, having a space reserved specifically and exclusively for it is not a little thing for me.  It is - in fact - quite a big thing.  Frank and one of his guys had started the job on Wednesday and put the finishing touches on it early Thursday afternoon.  Accuse me of bias if you will but I think it is simply beautiful. 


You may not be able to tell from this angle but the flamingos in Nona's Circle are smiling.  They too think he has created a fully functional work of art in our backyard. 

The presence of Frank's masterpiece (and if you live in or about the Central region of the State of Concrete Gardens - whether you are nestled 'NTSG or not - and are not a Bozzomo Landscaping customer you know not what you are missing) was in and of itself enough to raise Thursday above the tree line of an ordinary, hum-drum day.  It turned out that it was only the half of it. 

Since I purchased my "big boy" car last August, I have struggled with the ill-fitting, all-weather floor mats that Margaret and I bought for it.  I did not buy them from the dealer of course but went to Target or some such place.  How bad could they be I wondered.  It turns out, quite bad in fact.  While the floor mat protecting the carpet on the front seat passenger's side of the car caused nary a problem in the past twelve months - and none at all for me - its traveling companion on the driver's side was a pain in the ass.  Suffice it to say that one more than one occasion it decided its view of the world from beneath the gas pedal was inadequate and it popped its curled-up head up to get a better look of things.  Happiness is NOT having an impediment to the foot/accelerator pedal relationship.  

Last Sunday I finally broke down and did something I should have done months ago:  I hopped on the Weather-Tech.Com site and ordered custom-fitted floor mats.  Turns out that not only were they not terribly expensive but - hold on for the big finish - they actually were made to fit my car.  It was a feeling akin to buying a baseball cap without the adjustable plastic strip in the back.  They were not made for any car.  They were made for my car.  A perfect fit.  Parenthetically, due to my gynormous, bulbous-shaped cranium I have never been able to wear a baseball cap that did not have the adjustable plastic strip (or its Velcro equivalent) in the back.  No hat company makes "Jumbo Rock Head" as part of its regular inventory apparently.  

Floor mats and grill pads.  These are a few of my favorite things deep into the forty-sixth year of my existence.  Clearly, the question is not how long ago I ceased living life in the fast lane but, rather, for how long a period of time has my car been on the shoulder, flashers on, awaiting the arrival of AAA road service?  

The answer I suspect is, "Longer than I shall care to admit."  And not by a little bit either. 

-AK   

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