Thursday, March 14, 2013

Looking For A Big Toe

Proof once again that being God's comic is a tough gig.  In this space yesterday I mocked Dennis Rodman for his Asian adventure.  Yesterday he touched down in Rome to weigh in on the Papal selection process.  Almost immediately upon his arrival white smoke started billowing out of the faux chimney the Vatican erects for just such an occasion.  A new Pope had been elected.  

The College of Cardinals - not to confused with the Arizona Cardinals or the University of Phoenix - elected its first ever Latin American Pope.  Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio of Argentina, 76 years old, became the first non-European Pope since the 8th Century.  He immediately announced that he shall Pope Francis I.  

Two things leapt to the forefront of my mind.  First, if we call the Pope Francis will there be a Cardinal Hulka around to keep him on the right path?  To serve as his "Big Toe"?  To admonish him to "Lighten up Francis" when he gets too big for his pointy hat?  Second, at least in these United States the Catholic Church is an organization whose history of difficulties in the area of sexual abuse of minors has been well-chronicled.  The first thing the new guy in charge does upon getting the gig is start using an alias?  No one else is worried about this being a first step down a slippery slope?

I just hope my brother Kelly is ok today.  At great personal sacrifice,  he offered his services to the Church.  They did not even invite him to Rome.  'Tis an outrage I tell ya.  An outrage! 

-AK

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