Friday, November 9, 2012

I Went Out Looking For The Next Big Thing....

Because Murphy was an Irishman, a couple of days ago - and mercifully close to the end of its two-year contract - my cell phone decided it was simply not going to play any longer.  At some point Tuesday evening it sent me a "Cease and Desist" order.  Unfortunately it sent it to me via e-mail to my work e-mail address.  Since my office was waylaid by Sandy on October 29 we have been off of the grid entirely - e-mail included - so I never received the communication.  Had I known it was on its way, I might have been better prepared.  Perhaps if the powers that be at the Firm took note of the fact that we are based in the NORTHEAST they might be better prepared in the unlikely event that adverse weather occurs.  Hopefully this punch to the larynx serves as a wake-up call.  Wishing something would happen does not make it effing happen.  Ask Ann Romney.  She knows of which I speak.
 
Anyway, I took advantage of playing on my home field on Wednesday to go to the closest Verizon Wireless store and secure myself a new phone.  One cannot have one's only reliable source of communication with the outside world scuttled.  Shit, I was one more day without power away from converting to Amish ("Get thee to a butter churn!") as it was.  I am an upleasant asshole to be around when I am in a good mood.  I have been nowhere in the vicinity of a good mood for the past ten days or so. 
 
Luckily the young woman behind the counter at the Verizon store was as helpful as she was pleasant.  It took her about thirty-nine seconds to size me up as Alley Oop with a slightly less pronounced forehead and only about another twenty-one seconds to get me set up on my new phone.  I ended up "upgrading" to a Samsung Galaxy S III.  She described it to me as my present/now former phone "on steroids".  As a Yankee fan such a sobriquet told me all I needed to know.  
 
Which is good of course since I know less about technology than any person under the age of one hundred.  All I knew about my new gadget pre-purchase was that it is the gizmo for which the incessant series of "The Next Big Thing is Already Here" television commercials has been created.   Both Rob and Suz are iPhone owners - although at gun point I could not tell you which iteration of the device either possesses (Apple has likely launched at least two since I started to write this piece) and seem very happy with their phones so I take no rooting interest in the "our contraption vs. your contraption" techno-brawl.  My decision to buy the phone was predicated upon the fact that it took me close to a month to learn how to use the last one and the woman at the store told me that while the new device has a lot more bells and whistles (including one that accompanies every incoming text message) the basic operations are similar to those on the old phone.  In other words, having figured out the first one even I can figure out this one with a rather limited learning curve. 
 
We shall see.... 
 
....I missed three calls before I figured out how to answer it. 
 
-AK

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