Sunday, October 7, 2012

The Price of Badness

This has been a good week to be a fan of the Colorado Buffaloes football team.  Thus far in October we are unbeaten, which is a nice change of pace from September in which we were beaten senseless.  I suppose a cynic might be constrained to point out that as October reaches the beginning of its second full week - and let that roll around inside of your skull cap for a moment or three - that as of this very moment the Buffs have not yet played a game this month.  To you sir I say stop being a nattering nabob of negativism (rest easy Mr. Safire) and let me have my moment.  Damn it. 

And good fortune smiles upon the faithful as well - at least every now and then.  The Missus, Joe and I are heading to the Front Range to spend Thanksgiving Week imposing upon the hospitality of Jess and Rob.  In our defense they invited us.  Presuming that they do not suddenly become markedly better than they presently seem to be and earn a bowl bid - an accomplishment not quite as exceptional as a monkey flying out of my ass while singing Puccini but not far from it - their 2012 season shall mercifully end on Friday the 23rd of November at home against the Utes of Utah.  Irrespective of how bad they are, I cannot be in the great state of Colorado while they are playing a home game and not make the trek to Folsom to watch them play.  I am quite confident that the rest of my travelling party could do so quite easily.  Ditto for Jess....and probably Rob as well.  I suspect he is simply humoring me because he knows that while in Boulder we will find somewhere to enjoy a good meal and adult libations.   

Regardless of their tepid performance to date - and the anticipated downward spiral ahead (they went 1 for September against the easiest part of their schedule) - this past Friday I went on-line and purchased four tickets for the season finale against Utah.  Thanks to their tepid performance to date I was able to purchase the tickets for an absurdly low price.  I took advantage of the deep discount - on the secondary market no less - to score seats in the end zone at the open end of the field.  According to the Folsom Field seating map, our point of view will be something akin to this:

At worst, our end zone should see a lot of action for at least half of the game.  Utah will spend two quarters running plays in our direction.  Better still is the fact that the home sideline is to our left.  Ralphie will lead the Buffs out onto the field within spitting distance (not me so much because I find it hard to expectorate at altitude but Margaret has mad skills) of our seats

When she completes her journey around the horseshoe she will be led by her handlers along the visiting team's sideline and into her trailer.  The trailer is parked right next to the end zone, which means we will get to see that magnificent beast up close during her entry onto and her exit from the field.  And once she is secured in the trailer, if the Buffs are getting hammered by the Utes we can take our leave knowing that we have already experienced the afternoon's highlight.

Our team is dreadful.  But our mascot kicks ass. 

If only we could teach her how to throw and how to tackle....


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